Duke Nukem Wiki

This page contains quotes fromDuke Nukem Advance. Note: All conversations in Duke Nukem Advance are text. The only spoken dialogue in the game is some of Duke Nukem's ingame quotes. Also it should be noted some of the conversations vary significantly in different versions of Duke Nukem advance.


(When Duke Nukem meets the Spiderlord (Version 1))

  • Spiderlord: The futility of your persistence amuses me. It's a shame that I must kill you now.
  • Duke Nukem: You and what army?
  • Spiderlord: How naive you are to believe you've destroyed our army. You've managed to kill but a small fraction of warriors. No more than a minor setback. Our full army is safely located far from here as we we prepare for the extinction of the human race. I shall begin the process today with your extinction!
  • Duke Nukem: Time for a little alien autopsy. RPG style. Come get some!

(When Duke Nukem meets the Spiderlord (Version 2))

  • Spiderlord: You amuse me little human. As if your pathetic attempts could stop us. You are weak and nothing but food.
  • Duke Nukem: That's a lot of talk from an overgrown insect with a dead invasion army.
  • Spiderlord: All you've managed to do is kill an expendable fraction of our warriors.Our full army is obviously located elsewhere. I wouldn't expect you to understand that with 100% of your brain.
  • Duke Nukem: Come get some. Time for an alien autopsy.

(When Duke meets the Alien Controller)

  • Duke Nukem: Who the hell are you supposed to be the Scorpion King? You're one nasty case of crabs.
  • Alien Controller: I am the 'Controller'. I protect the colony. We will destroy your atmosphere with our doomsday machine; then awaken our slumbering army.
  • Duke Nukem: Yeah,Yeah..... Prepare to die. I've heard that one before. I'll kick your ass till your nose bleeds.

(When General Graves finds out the none of Duke Nukem's weapons can hurt the Alien Controller)

  • General Graves: Duke we're detecting a massive power reading around the controller. He may be protected by shields.
  • Duke Nukem: Don't worry general shields or not I'll find a way to crush this crustacean cretin.

(After Duke Nukem activates the large Crusher which instantly kills the Alien Controller off screen)

  • General Graves: Duke the hibernation tanks have been drained and the alien army has finally been destroyed. Good work.
  • Duke Nukem: Damn I'm good.

(When Duke realizes the temple is going to collapse)

  • General Graves: Duke what's your mission status?
  • Duke Nukem: I made crab cakes out of the controller but he activated a self-destruct sequence before he died.
  • General Graves: That temple is thousands of years old and a world wonder. It's a shame to see it destroyed.
  • Duke Nukem: If I don't get out of here fast; you're going to lose two wonders. I'm heading for another alien teleporter.

(After Duke Nukem successfully shuts down the cooling units on the alien ship)

  • Duke Nukem: The cooling units are shut down and the reactor is starting to heat up.
  • General Graves: Great work, Duke. Find Jenny 5 and get the hell... (gets interrupted)
  • Alien Lord: (Contacts Duke and General Graves) Earth fools! I have the earth woman secured. If you want her you'll have to go through me. Our ship may be doomed but I'll get the satisfaction of seeing you die with it.
  • Duke Nukem: Not on your life ass-goblin. I'll be vacationing with hot-babes,while your atoms are flying past uranus. (Duke then goes off to find the Alien Lord and confront him)